i'm building an ark

If you use Facebook, please please PLEASE read this link. I'm tired of receiving your spam after your account gets hacked.

Usually I jot my thoughts down during the week, so by Friday you have a full week's worth of brain dump to entertain yourselves with. This week, I've really had nothing specific going on to bitch write about, so I'm stuck kinna rambling here during lunch today.

Kid1 is still working extremely part-time down at the Hole. With every week that he's not working full-time+, he's digging himself deeper and deeper. He's still got all the past-due bills from last year at school to pay before he can registration for next semester. His intention is to move into a campus apartment in July... that plan is on really shaky ground now.

I did offer to reimburse him for all of his school expenses on a pro-rated basis. Better grades = better reimbursement. I'll pick up the tab 100% if he lays down all A's & B's.

The other kids are all winding up for the end of the school year. They all had solid grades at the last report card, and we haven't heard anything recently to lower our expectations. They've got just about 3 weeks left before they're free for the summer. I miss those days a lot. I've got 3 weeks til the end of my current semester, and 4 weeks til the new semester begins.

Kid2 is taking her SATs on Saturday morning. She's playing it off like she's really not worried, but I can see the twinges of anxiousness in her eyes whenever the topic comes up. I think she's got pretty high hopes for getting in to any college she wants to, and knows that a good bit of weight rides on this test. We all know that you can take it more than once, but she's pretty aggressive and totally wants to nail it in a single shot.

The rest of the weekend is full of other famstuff. We're getting together Sunday to do family pics. We do pics with the kids annually, but it's been a while since we've had pics of the 'rents & sibs & kids & errybody. A good family friend happens to have a fantastic eye for making us goofballs appear to be a halfway normal family unit.

(If you think you're kinna funny looking too, but want really good pics, get in touch with Kerry at K & R Photography.)

After the pics, we're heading to my little bro's for a BBQ and house-warming party. He's all growed-up now, with a mortgage and a lady to keep him in line. So we're cooking burgers on his new grill on his new back deck, and probably moving furniture around for him, too.

My buddy Eddi is coming into the states for a couple weeks. If he's got the desire, he'll be an honorary goofball at the BBQ. We're not putting him in the pics though. That would lead to too many questions....

Besides that, nothing much going on around here. Except rain. Lots n lots n lots of rain. Please quit raining before the weekend. Please?


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Puppy Curling would be a heckuva lot more entertaining if you could use the broom on the pups. (Credit to Manda for sending this game forever ago.)

Blow stuff up, including your opponent, and get hidden power ups. The title says it all: Playing with Fire.

If the invisible man starred in movies, Name This Movie.

You suck at online games. Bullet Time proves it. Game over, before you even start.



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20 years later, this guy still has the biggest nads:


CrouchTards

Not all old people suck, these two can still light the fire:


Eric told me he trips old ladies at the mall, too. Just for fun.


The ladies' answer to the Jizz in My Pants guys...



(giggle)


This is not a happy ending.


Yes, it was staged. Quitcherbitchin; you know better. Think it was just coincidence that the camera zooomed in on him before the 'accident'?


I need basketball, hockey, and baseball to hurry up and be done so it can be football season again.




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trading teeth for segways

The Onion published an article last week that was more truth than fiction. I think they may have done it again. Four simple, one syllable words. What's so hard to understand?

If you remember from last week, my buddy Eddi was on his way into town from from Germany. We'd worked together for many many years, but never met in real life. It was like being in an online dating club.

So anyway, me, Eddi, and a few people from my old office got together last weekend. It was an odd situation.... we used to all be professional drinkers. For various reasons, 3 out of 5 had to be on good behavior. Eddi and I were not in that group. We didn't get drunk to the point of stupid, but we were definitely rolling a pretty good buzz by the end of the night.

It was kinda neat to hang out together finally. After only a minute or two, it was like we went to the bar together every Friday night. I thought there may be a bit of get-to-know-you bullshit questions and answers, but we all just breezed right past that to just regular bullshit. Like making fun of the stoner girl in the K-hole wearing a dress that looked like a chain-link fence. She would have been hot, too, if her eyes weren't so empty. THAT'S entertainment.

So drunk Eddi and drunk me were summoned by the designated driving committee to head home before the bar locked up and kicked us out for real. They seemed a little irritated when I changed my shirt in the middle of the bar. (It was a gift; thanks Tina!) On the way back to the garage, Eddi spots the coolest Segway ever sitting in the security guard's office. It was just like the regular people-mover Segways, but with big knobby off-road tires on it. Something like this:


The guard wasn't in the mood to let us take it for a spin though. He was acting friendly enough, but it was all just an act. He was keeping his anger all bottled up inside, which is so totally unhealthy. He wanted to help us have fun, but his resentment at looking like Gary Coleman without teeth just wouldn't let him do it. I tried, too. I thought I had him for a minute, too, but the buzzer sounded the end of my game before I could sign the deal. Visions of riding the ramps in the parking garage went down the drain, and we had to walk back to the car.

I'm happy that the weekend went so well, b/c I've had a tough week this time 'round. Nothing awful, just lots of pain-in-the-tail stuff going on.

Work has been really busy, and really reactive, too. I've had surprises just about every day, and that really wears on me. Stupid emergencies go hand-in-hand with working for the gubmint, so I'm used to firefighting. Just b/c I'm used to it though doesn't mean I like it.

Kidstuff has been wearing on me too. Not the kids themselves, but the school. The kids are all doing very well. Report cards came home, and they all nailed solid grades. (Really makes me smile and wonder whose kids they are.) I'm actually struggling with the guidance office at the high school. I've been working since Monday to get a conference set up, and the twinkie in the office just can't seem to get her shit together. It's Friday now, and next week is a holiday, so I'm not expecting to get it done til the first week of December. The schools always complain about a lack of parental involvement, but so so often the school is the actual communications roadblock.

We've got a good week of famstuff and holidays coming up. Not sure if I'll be posting anything next Friday or not. I may either be too busy or too relaxed to do any writing. You may get lucky. Dunno yet.

Now, if you only click one link from this whole freaking post, please make it this one. Brent sent me the link to this blog about eating super-extreme hot sauce. I dare you to read this story without giggling like you're missing a chromosome. "...a handful of broken glass and gravel..."??? Wow.

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Donna really pisses me off sometimes. This maze game is nothing but frustration.

99 luft balloons. Or not.

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Jules and the Backseat Betties are playing out at the Auld Shebeen in Fairfax tonight. Hot chicks, good bar, and 80s music - what else could you want?

Best Video EVER:


The Moro Islamic Liberation Front shot down and captured a US Spy plane. The story is wayyyyyy funnier to me than the paper intended.

Black Friday is coming. Here's your cheat sheet to know what the retailers don't want you to know.

As simple as it gets.


I hate to give out free advertising, especially since Verizon Wireless has been so good to me over the past years. But Sprint created the most annoying site I've seen in a long, long time.

How to piss off everyone else on the highway.

Kim's new boyfriend has skills!


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